celeste_noelani | My tweets

Mon, 16:41: @ridingburritos checking in. How are you doing?
Mon, 16:51: Checking in, since so many of us are struggling with #depression and #suicide ideation. How are you? Let's keep each other safe.
Mon, 16:53: I mean that's all we can do. It's so sad about Robin Williams, but I didn't know him. I know you, and can check in with you. So here I am.
Mon, 16:56: If we all check in with our friends who we know are struggling and at risk? (And we ALL know someone.) How many lives could we save?
Mon, 16:58: @ThisisLauraS How you doing, love?
Mon, 16:59: Are you safe?
Mon, 17:06: Smokey Robinson & The Miracles-The Tears Of A Clown: http://t.co/SHZYIvMXd7
Mon, 17:07: RT @ElliottBayBooks: Grateful for our friends at @AFSP_WA, dedicated to preventing suicide. Thank you for all the work you do.
Mon, 17:08: RT @mdaisey: When people who fight this die, we shouldn't condemn. We should celebrate every day they tied themselves to the naked earth an…
Mon, 17:11: RT @kairuy: Tremendous outpouring of love & grief for Robin Williams makes me think, "didn't he know how loved he is?" Then I remember, tha…

Mon, 17:12: RT @ridingburritos: No one should be ashamed of living with mental illness. Those who do are not "weak." They are the strongest people you …
Mon, 17:18: I wrote this a couple years ago but it's still a struggle today. The Death of Suicide http://t.co/l8oJzEPCPw
Mon, 17:19: Like, literally today. I struggled with wanting to kill myself today. With talking myself into just trying one more day.
Mon, 17:22: My brain is Dread Pirate Roberts. "Good night, Celeste. Good work. Sleep well. Most likely kill you in the morning."
Mon, 17:23: And that's just...every day. Every single day. Whether or not anything is "going on," I have to bargain. Just one more day.
Mon, 17:24: Some days are harder than others, but every day is a bargain. So far, I've got thousands of one more days under my belt.
Mon, 17:25: RT @CatsandCatts: Worst response ever. RT @JoshMankiewicz: Very sorry to hear that someone as talented as Robin Williams couldn't see more …
Mon, 17:28: I have a family who loves me, friends who check in, and the best life I've ever known. Yet none of that is louder than my depression.
Mon, 17:29: Because my depression is inside my own brain, and it's *always* finding ways to engage me in its horrible little diatribes.
Mon, 17:30: No one could possibly ever tell me they love me enough to offset the constant barrage of hate mail I get from inside my own head.

Mon, 17:31: And here's the thing: I'm in treatment! Treatment that is working! This IS a relief from the monsters that used to live in here.
Mon, 17:35: So far, I have won 100% of the battles I have fought against suicide ideation. I am so grateful for that. I am so seriously fortunate.
Mon, 17:35: RT @fragileannie: The public really needs to wrap their head around the fact that #depression is a severe, often life-long illness, and not…
Mon, 17:36: RT @valerievaldes: Don't wait to tell people they are important to you. Do it now. Be kind. Be earnest. Be there for each other.
Mon, 17:43: I am going to keep fighting, because that's what you do when you're sick. You do everything you can to get better.
Mon, 17:45: And now I fight the good fight by picking up my daughter from day care and letting her lick my face. It's life!
Mon, 17:46: I'm safe. I'm talking, so I'm safe. <3
Mon, 20:01: RT @tracyvwilson: When someone dies of cancer, the refrain is "fuck cancer." But when someone dies of depression, it's "get help." Well. …
Mon, 21:01: Oh barf. Just tallied how much money I've spent on mental health care over the past four years. I should not have done that.
Mon, 21:03: RT @DigitallyDownld: Everything wrong with modern media in one screenshot: http://t.co/IipUQeVPzv

Mon, 21:06: And yet, I know how fucking lucky I am to be able to afford this level of care. Shit, any care at all.
Mon, 21:14: Oh! Lol. I shouldn't have TALLIED how much I spend on therapy. Not that I shouldn't have gone. YES I AM WORTH EVERY PENNY GODDAMMIT.
Mon, 22:54: NEW POST: I'm Tired of Needing Therapy http://t.co/7EdQKDVGzT #depression #suicide #grief #ugh
Tue, 09:30: New on the blog: I'm Tired of Needing Therapy http://t.co/iRp3ctaqIk #depression #suicide
Tue, 10:18: So uncomfortable seeing all the "Genie, you're free" imagery after Robin Williams' suicide.
Tue, 10:20: I mean, I GET it and everything, but I already feel like death would be a release from all this pain. I'm struggling with that more rn.
Tue, 10:21: And that is a VERY dangerous thing for me to think, and to struggle with. I personally need to view death as the end, NOT as freedom.
Tue, 10:22: Right now, it's kind of difficult to stay connected to my internet lifelines AND avoid that triggering imagery at the same time.
Tue, 10:23: Also, after the Genie was released, he fucking went on vacation and came back for numerous sequels. So this is not, you know, the same.
Tue, 10:24: Maybe I'm the only one bothered by this? I dunno.

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